Falling for Lies

Hit Her With Reality and Her Ghost Shall Not Remain Hollow

2011-12-23T20:19:00.000-05:00

I don't know
how to please the
unhappy.
I can't even please
myself.
I don't know how
to silence the angry.
I never get my----
chance to speak.
I don't know how
to give hope to
the hopeless.
I don't even feel
anymore.

Only the Silenced Hear

2011-12-23T20:16:00.000-05:00

wasteful the death
of morrow
the life not returned
cringe into the broken;
the heart has not learned

promise me the
future
and kindle me
into your arms
death has not
forsaken me
although your
soul has been warned

Trapped in his Monopoly

2011-12-23T20:14:00.000-05:00

another decision yet has cost
another smile in
my bank
another choice
has prevented
another human
to thank
in my wake
I have ripened
the fruit of the
last call
my last stand up show
I stand with nothing
at all

Hold Me in the Shadows of your Dreams

2011-12-23T20:12:00.001-05:00

no words to say
how fallen I am,
how quiet she lay
in the eyes of
the plan
make haste to
promise love
no decision has yet been
made
no rush to follow her
shadow
more sun, if you
had stayed

Carolina BBQ Chips with Beer Is Always Tasty

2011-11-15T02:54:00.001-05:00

its funny how

life takes such

sudden-

changes

and I went from doing

nothing but smile

trailing

your

shadow

and I don't mind

I'll walk around

waiting for you

to notice

that I

right

here

Isn't It Fancy that You Only Want One Thing

2011-10-28T02:56:00.000-04:00

hold me in your arms
tell me that you want me
tell me that you want to be
more than just this
take this pain i have
kiss away the hurt
rub my crying eyes
scrub away the dirt
care for me like
i care for you
love me
like i know
you'll never do

The Funny Sound Water Coolers Make

2011-10-17T16:02:00.002-04:00

and I thought that maybe

we could be done with this

cycle of me pulling down

me pulling down

and you pushing

your pushing me to a point

where I can't breathe

or scream

screaming

I'm screaming at you

but you hear laughter

they hear nothing

they see the bruises

bruises on my arm

can't see bruises on

my heart

heart

my heart

is broken

you have broken

breaking me once again

because this cycle

cycles over

and over

over me, I can't get

over you

as I lie

underneath

your constant restraint

restraining my life to

nothing

nothing I am

Maybe if You Stopped Talking About You, You Would Hear My Scream

2011-10-11T23:03:00.003-04:00

Removed

from space, and time

-is no longer mine

Replaced

in this moment, here

-a place you are not

Arranged

like a doll on a shelf, there

-i wish that's where I was

Accelerated

to a land I don't belong, to

-be someone I'm not

Prepared

if you're getting used to, this

-hasn't gotten old for you yet

Pulled

out of realization, gone

-is what i'll never be

Expected

to be a smiling ball of, fun

-what you have when you hurt me

Extended

out into the, far

-is where i should be when it comes to you

Denied

all attempts of, ending

-is what i need to do

Destroyed

i have no more, chances

-that i cannot take because of you

Is That Really What You Want the Last Thing You Say to Me To Be

2011-10-10T15:41:00.004-04:00

i'm going to dance like you
aren't standing there
with you're hand cupped over
your mouth
wondering
what the hell did you just get into
i'm going to do what i do

i'm going to sing like you
aren't recording my
horrid voice from
outside the bathroom
and going to put it on youtube
to show the world
how tone-deaf your
girlfriend really can be
i'm going to just be me

i'm going to smile like you
aren't waiting right around
the corner
with a pie dish filled
with whipped cream
just waiting to smash my face
and hear me scream
so you can tell your friends later
you're the bomb
i'm going to be nothing like your mom(:

i'm going to love like you
aren't up early in the morning
just to make the coffee first
cause you know
without it
i might just be your mom
and that would end badly
i'm just going to be me,
you'll see

Give Me A Night Flower, and Call it A Rose

2011-10-10T15:31:00.004-04:00

and i'll stay in yo arms foreva
as long as you're be willing to hold
my face in your hands
smiling,
listening ta me tell you all ta plans

i ain't goin no where
lest you kick me
straight______
out the house
and onto the porch
baby

cause you can't evict no girl
from your heart
so i might be gone from your bed
and even tho she might
be in your
sheet--->there
i'm still goin ta be
the one in yo head

but i won't get to no bad stuff
cause i be trustin you
wit it
ALL
because that's where you gotta
start
i gotta trust you
to get me
when
i
fall.

and if in the end
you still standin there
shakin yo head at
me and my ramblin
motor mouth self
and you be brushin that
new south wind
outta my hair

then i be knowin
that i aint gotta worry bout
no otha girl
cause you aint goin

and it's cute how you walk out so quickly when the conversation turns to you

2011-10-10T15:25:00.005-04:00

tired of excuses
tired of walking away
tired of taking chances
tired of seizing the day

tired of trusting liars
tired of believing you
tired of listening to everything
tired of being told what to do

tired of being hit
tired of having to deal
tired of shaking scared
tired of what's real

tired of bleeding
tired of screaming
tired of crying
tired of dreaming

tired of wondering
tired of giving
tired of hoping
to be honest ;
just tired of living

Seeing in Negatives

2011-10-05T23:39:00.002-04:00

leaning against

that old willow tree

that's be standing there

ma whole life

you start thinkin about some things

you thinkin

why did i think

i knew everythin back then

standing against

that old willow tree

that's been standing there

longer than i'm willin to admit

you get to watchin

them other kids playin

in the sand box

and you thinkin to ya self

man, i wish i was in da sandbox

falling against

that old willow tree

that's seen so many lives past by

you start rememberin ol' stories

and you get mighty depressed

cause you ain't got no one

to share em with

but then ya stare up

at that ol' willow tree

and you get to thinkin

damn, i don't even have ta

tell ya

Sometimes You're Inspired, Other Times You Aren't

2011-10-05T23:31:00.003-04:00

baby girl, i say to you

that though we've never met

know, that there is nothing i regret

my chances with you

taken from both of us

i ask you to forgive, to learn, to trust

there is no time

that i don't wish to hear your voice

if only we had a choice

baby girl, trust

that I fought for you

but in the end there was nothing i could do

baby girl, believe

that I tried

but I still failed to keep you alive

baby girl, consider

that nothing in life is free

nothing comes easy

baby girl, know

that it was him that did this

is wasn't me.

Sailboat on a Book

2011-10-05T13:28:00.002-04:00

shaking with weakness
I'm trying to explain
where my thoughts come from;
why I'm filled with pain

at a loss for words,
I hope you can understand my tears.
I've been meaning to tell you
for all of these years.

Does it Make You Feel Good to Know I Roll With Your Punches

2011-09-27T19:46:00.005-04:00

taking deep breaths

the last of the few

my heart stutters

knowing what i have to do

i've asked the sparkling eyes

to save me from despair

in my blurring eyes i see

they don't really care

dependent on pills

to keep me awake

was dependent on you

to keep me from this mistake

wish i knew how to pull myself out

and make it better

too late i'm afraid

as i sleep now forever.

Break It, You Buy It: But You Don't Own Me

2011-09-26T17:02:00.003-04:00

it'd be nice

every once in a while

if somebody

would notice

that im

not

happy

and as i

lie with my face

buried into

my sheets

i realize no

one can hear me

and no one can see it

if only they knew

everything

like i did

maybe

just maybe

they might

understand

just how bad

it hurts

Holding Stars in Your Back Pocket

2011-09-22T22:15:00.005-04:00

I was taught to express how I feel through writing. Luckily TLC wrote it for me.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eG1_2k5jTwg

If I Never Get to Meet The President, At Least I Have You

2011-09-21T19:22:00.005-04:00

you could be stupid

you could be ugly

you could be cupid

you could be smugly

you could be fun

you could be rude

you could be dumb

you could be crude

you could be poor

you could be tall

you could be more

you could be small

you could be it

you could be sad

you could be shit

you could be bad

you could be grand

you could be flauntly

you could be bland

as long as want me

Pretending to Text to Avoid Confrontation

2011-09-21T19:16:00.003-04:00

usually before i make it

anywhere

i quit

but this time i'm happy

to say i found it

somewhat often I find

i don't care a bit

but it's different this time

because i found it

I never believe

a thing that those experts have writ

but I'll take it all back

since I have finally found it

Regularly I brace myself

for the bruise following

the hit

but guess what?

i don't have to

cause you helped me find it.

Laughing Is Almost As Fun As Watching You Suffer

2011-09-20T16:54:00.003-04:00

sun who uses its might
and knows everything
will you teach we how to
be free and sing?

teach me to learn
like the trees
to hum like the bees
to love like the rain
to never feel pain
to smile like river
to fly like the breeze
to shine like silver
to fall as the leaves

teach me to breathe
like the flowers
to run like the birds
to lay peaceful for hours
to express love in words
to feel as valiantly as weather
and after I've learned it all;
to sleep quiet forever

Can your daddy's PT Cruiser do this?

2011-09-20T16:45:00.002-04:00

desperation before I reach again
finding I can't find the words
I have to say with pen

falling short of everything
a failure yet i am
try to keep on smiling
faults take stand.

broken promises i am pieceless
surrounded by black grief
broken heart stays sleepless
respect: the first to leave.

Dubstep isn't Dubstep without a Drop

2011-09-19T20:24:00.003-04:00

so how am i supposed to know

which pieces fit where

on the giant puzzle of life?

deep breaths and despair

i just wanna get this one thing

right.

fighting for everything at once

i dont wanna let you down

but how do i win honestly?

the biggest secret of them all

i just want someone to fight for me.

I say you find your own way home.

2011-09-19T14:31:00.003-04:00

couldn't be the sound

you needed

couldn't be the hand

you reached for

couldn't be the heart

you wanted so much to share

reaching for stars

reaching for chances

never gonna get close

enough

i wish i were close

enough

to reach for anything

again.

missed opportunities

missed..i have missed

i will miss

i can miss

i always miss

hit or miss?

I Refuse to Finish Last First

2011-09-16T22:54:00.003-04:00

trying new food is easy

trying to kill is gorey

trying to learn is useless

trying to love is a whole different story.

believing in unicorns is sweet

believing in ghosts is weary

believing in faeries is different

believing in love, though, is totally scary.

hating is simple and unnecessary

laughing is relaxing and fun

crying is harmful and hurts

loving is stupid and can't be undone.

Close the door and Open Three More

2011-09-06T12:54:00.002-04:00

there's no love like yours

i swear by the planes,

the trees,

the hearts,

the warmth behind doors,

there's no love like yours

hiding behind lies

i keep silent and hold my breath

counting

down

to one

the sound dies

shh, i'm

hiding behind lies

i'm protecting my sanity

i'll sit

i'll stay

i'll roll over

i'll play dead

for your vanity

i'm protecting my sanity

there's only one way to leave

not easy but do-able

pushing open

the only door in my way

wiping tears on my sleeve

there's only one way to leave

and i've found it.

You Missed My Face Tough Guy

2011-08-20T23:17:00.004-04:00

they can sit and take all your lies

but I think it'd be fair

to pick on someone your own size

you don't know these people

or how they were raised

but they still hold something over you

they're getting paid(:

you're ignorant and impatient;

most definitely not worth my time

but it's hard to ignore

when you start to offend

something of mine.

I like what I like

and I'll do what I do

and if you don't like it

quite frankly

fuck you.

No one is making you listen

No one is making you stay

And if you're done bitching about me

You can shut the hell up

if that's okay?

And if you're not done pointing fingers

and thinking of hateful words to send

then you might as well leave and

make another ignorant friend.

Cause I like what I like

and I'll do what I do.

And if you don't like it.

How about this?

I don't care what you think

you ignorant, demoralizing, son of a bitch,

so fuck you.

Im done.

That One Instrumental That Always Sounds Good

2011-08-19T15:37:00.003-04:00

feeling like

happyis maybe

something i could manage

to do

ya know,

even if it's just for a few

breathing in patience

exhaling concern

can you hear

the beatsinmy heart

going a tiny bit slower

well thats a

good start

I'll be your Robin if You'll be my Batman

2011-08-17T19:31:00.005-04:00

hey love,

you're like that shinycrystalmoon

I have hanging in my window

and every afternoon

when you glisten

I smile.

hey gorgeous,

your voice is like

myabsolutefavoritesong

and I'm more than willing

to put you on repeat

if you'll play along.

hey handsome,

your like

everythingIeverwanted

and then some

and every time

you smile at me

my everything goes numb.

hey babe,

your like

everysuperherointheworld

and I love you times that many

so be my batman

and i'll be your girl

Look at What You've Gone and Done

2011-08-17T15:24:00.003-04:00

i've never been more angry,

more scared, or more bruised

in all the time i've spent with

anyone until you

i've never been so trapped,

so indifferent, or so blue

in all the time i've spent with

anyone until you

but i've never been so happy,

so warm, and so true

ever since the day you made me

fall in love with you.

Back off the Bitch

2011-08-16T02:57:00.005-04:00

Let's not pretend

like we didn't mean

for this to happen.

I know you knew

what was going on,

and your still laughing.

Please don't take this back,

it hurts more than

you know

and even if you don't

want me

at least i can let

that go

If you wanted just a thrill

than you could've asked

any other.

instead of playing with

my heart

what ever happened

to her

I would have

given you my everything,

my blood, last drop, and all.

and every last tear

I shed also,

as you laugh

while I fall.

Time is Falling

2011-08-15T14:49:00.002-04:00

What am I supposed to think

When I have no more answers

for you than myself

I can't make up the truth.

How should I answer your

cruel intentions

When I think I deserve them all.

I couldn't lie to you.

I know you know this,

that what I've become

isn't what I used to be.

Which direction is right?

Let's not be condescending.

I can't give you that anymore.

You know I can't

Don't pressure me for it

Don't pressure me for it.

Times have called for a break.

Let's let go now,

before someone gets hurt...

more than they already are.

Just let it go.

Just let this go..

I Can Tell You Want This Forever

2011-08-12T23:05:00.003-04:00

I can tell you mean it

forever

but I'm scared of

what I see

never took a chance

this big

why're you wasting

this time on me

I can tell you deserve

much more

my eyes are open

wide

what if I leave you

with nothing

I can't say that

I tried

I can tell that you love me

with passion

my walls still run

far

anger and hatred have

left us

now all we have are

scars

I can tell that you'll

be here forever

so I'll take this seat

with you

but love is a big

emotion

and it scares me

to tell you the truth.

Playing the Angel's Song

2011-08-10T22:49:00.003-04:00

and when you held

my face your hands

all you wanted was for me

to understand

and when you pushed

my hair behind my ear

all you wanted was for me

to hear

and when you held me

as I shook and cried

all you wanted was for me

to try

And She Cried to the Back of the Wall

2011-08-10T22:44:00.004-04:00

your hands are the evil

that touch me to ghost

but its your lack of sincerity

that makes me hate you most

your hands are the evil

that scratch across my face

but it's your other weapon

that puts me in my place

It's Not My Fault She Didn't Want You

2011-08-10T22:40:00.004-04:00

I smile so sweetly

at your apparent small confidence

for you see,

my dear,

this means that I have won.

no tear,

my dear,

will be shed for your insecurity

because I fear,

my life,

was never yours entirely

so when you see

me happily

don't privilege yourself

for,

you, had nothing to do with it

and loving,

my dear,

was never your best quality.

Skipping Pebbles on the Soon to be Polluted River

2011-08-10T22:36:00.003-04:00

I never had a chance

to smile after my first kiss

or to write silly love poems

about a boy i'd never miss

I never had a chance

to really fall for a guy

and to hold his hand and smile

and kiss under the sky

I never had a chance

to choose who I wanted

and since I can't get it back

my memories are forever haunted

Today I Fought A War Against My Conscious

2011-08-10T22:32:00.004-04:00

how often I come here

blood dripping down my hand

and staring at my broken reflection

in broken shards of glass

that were used to slice my soul

so that I know its still there

************************

how often I go there

needle shaking in my hand

and feeling the rush go through my veins,

the belt squeezing my arm

so that I don't make the mistake

of overdoing it

************************